Are you in love or are you afraid of being alone?

Are you in love or are you afraid of being alone?

While the idea of being alone is frightening, the act of being alone is incredibly empowering.

If it has been a long time since you have been in a relationship, you are probably aware of the freedom you have. Yet, you may have to remind yourself that it is  better to be alone and happy than to be in a relationship that just doesn’t work.

Think of your single-hood as a gift from the universe. You have the gift of opportunity. You have the chance to meet new people. And any day could be the day that you meet the one you are meant to share your life with.

But how do you know if you are really in love or just afraid to be alone.

Be honest with yourself. Think about your partner.  If you were describing him to someone else rate him on a scale. If you make excuses, like you admire him but . . . You appreciate him but . . .  I love what he does but . . .

All of this shows you care about them but are not truly accepting of them. If you truly love them, you love every aspect of them.

But the biggest sign that you’re not in love is if you are expecting him to change and become something that he’s not.  If you don’t want who he is right now, you are not likely to love him any better if he changes. The best relationships are those where a couple grows together.  Expecting someone to change into a tax attorney when you met a bluegrass fiddler, is setting yourself up for a loss.

If you find yourself spending most of your time hoping, praying and daydreaming about the day when things will be different, you are just depriving yourself of a chance to be truly happy. And when you stay in blissful ignorance you are telling yourself that you don’t deserve true love. The best way to move forward is to give yourself a chance to find what you need and what you deserve. Be honest with yourself and find strength in being alone.

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